UK General Election – Arise Commissar Corbyn

In a world exclusive, The Rembau Times calls the UK Election for a Labour led coalition government headed by Jeremy Corbyn as the new Commissar of the United Kingdom.

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Commissar Corbyn set to be named as UK's next Prime Minister. Credits: Money Week

The UK Election is coming soon and the stakes would appear very high. If Jeremy Corbyn becomes Prime Minister, the some investors are afraid that the FTSE and the pound could crash by 10%.

Having done the maths, The Rembau Times is now coming with the bold prediction that Labour will form a coalition Government with SNP, sending Jeremby Corybn to 10 Downing Streer as the incoming Prime Minister of the UK.

(Note: To those unfamiliar with UK politics this is considered as likely as Malaysia beating France to win the World Cup. If any pollster predicts a Corbyn as PM scenario, he will likely be fired for suspicion of being drunk on the job.)

We repeat this is totally against all opinion polls that are predicting a Conservative victory. If you follow the experts, it means Rembau Times is dead wrong!

This stunning turn of events would probably shock the financial markets on Friday.

 

Eventhough Corybn is universally hated by the British public, the UK election this Thursday will turn on something uniquely British – the Weather.

Based on current estimates, the following is the weather forecast during election day.

Winds of up to 100mph are expected to batter the UK with yellow warnings now put in place. More stormy weather is coming – and it will be joined by heavy rain and freezing temperatures on election day on Thursday. The Met Office has put the warnings in place for most of Scotland and the north of England for Tuesday.

This will deter “Old Folks” (50 and above) from going out to vote which will severely affect the Conservative vote count in the toss up parliamentary constituencies. If the weather was not a factor, Boris Johnson’s conservatives would win the election outright with a 10 seat majority.

However, with the weather playing a factor, the turnout for the old folks will be disproportionately lower than accounted for, leaving Labour to triumph in key voting areas on a reduced count.

Our final count has

  • Labour – 289 seats
  • SNP  – 41 seats
  • Conservatives – 302 seats
  • DUP – 10 seats
  • Sinn Fein – 7 seats

Labour to form a coalition Government with SNP, DUP and Sinn Fein, for a total of 347 seats, 22 seats higher than required to form a majority. The impact on this on FTSE could be quite massive, as many investors are very afraid of Jeremy Corbyn

The full seat by seat prediction is over here.

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